Actions speak louder than words.
That is what you need to keep in mind if you want to be one of the best girlfriends of all time. If your relationship matters, you need to be honest, give your partner space, and focus on being understanding.
Just don’t forget about yourself in the process.
1. To Be a Best Girlfriend, You Don’t Have to Give Up Your Friends
While men expect women to be less self-directed in a relationship, that does not mean you should give up your friends or stop meeting them after work.
Yes, it’s true – a relationship changes some things in life.
However, that does not mean you have to be over-attached. It is actually a good thing to have your own set of friends and hobbies. Which leads us to the next tip.
2. Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder
If you want your bond to become stronger, you have to remember the saying, “Absence makes the heart grow fonder.”
That means you can still do your own thing and get together with friends. If you learn to do things for yourself, you won’t mind if your man spends some time with his pals.
You can share more information about your individual experiences, and make the time you spend together more special.
3. The Best Girlfriends of All Time Allow Some Room for Compromise
You don’t have to win every argument, even if you believe you are right.
If you want to be the best girlfriend ever, this is not necessary. Even if you know he is wrong, you will diminish his self-confidence, which will ultimately affect your relationship.
Instead, of always being right, allow some room for compromise. If you are right about something, your partner will eventually see the wisdom in your logic.
4. Don’t Overly Talk about Your Future Together
You won’t win an award as one of the best girlfriends of all time if you hint to your boyfriend about your future together as a couple.
Most guys do not like to think in terms of a commitment, and therefore, a word like “together” or “always” will make them feel disoriented or a bit out of control.
5. Take Things Slow – Don’t Jump into the Sea without Testing the Waters
Even if your boyfriend wants to get closer to you, the thought of a future together may give him second thoughts. If you want to solidify your relationship, you have to learn to take things slow.
For example, wait until you live together to commit to a “together” activity.
This type of activity might include raising a pet together or taking an evening walk. The more things you do together, the closer your bond.
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A ‘best girlfriend’ understands about giving her guy extra space and therefore does not force an already good thing.
6. Listen to Your Partner – Show Him You Appreciate Him
Listening to your partner and asking him about his day will make him feel special and loved. Men also like to feel appreciated.
Whenever he goes out of his way, for instance, to make dinner reservations, don’t forget to thank him!
Let him know you appreciate his efforts.
Be direct about your gratitude. Don’t just say, “That was thoughtful.” Tell him the following first, “Thanks for making dinner reservations.” Then follow up by saying, “That was very thoughtful.”
By taking this approach, you are reminding your partner that what he did (making dinner reservations) was something you noticed and that it made a difference.
7. Keep Things Positive
He will consider that you are one of the best girlfriends of all time if you smile and keep things positive.
A positive facial expression and an upbeat demeanor mean a lot to a man. When you appear positive and happy, your boyfriend will feel better just being close to you.
Remember that song, “Close to You,” by the Carpenters.
Those lyrics are the lyrics that a best girlfriend sings – at least in a guy’s mind. Remember the first part?
Why do birds suddenly appear
Every time you are near?
Just like me, they long to be
Close to you
8. Begin the Conversation with a Smile
Even if you talk about a bad experience, begin the conversation with a smile. Also, smile when he visits you or comes home after work.
Ask him about his workday. Remain cheerful as you listen. He cannot help but think you are the best girlfriend ever if you take this approach.
9. Don’t Let the Green-eyed Monster Affect You
Try to stay mindful of his moods and how your behavior may affect him. For example, you don’t want to appear too jealous or allow the green-eyed monster to banish what you consider a good thing.
10. Stop Complaining About His Friends
While it is nice to like planning alone time with him, your partner still needs to bond with his buddies.
By trying to get to know his friends, who knows? You may start liking them. If you want to be a ‘best girlfriend’, you need to make a genuine effort at liking some of the people he likes.
By taking this initiative, it will strengthen your relationship.
11. Stop Clinging to Him – Give Him Some Space
If you don’t want to give him the idea that you crave his attention or that you are possessive, refrain from texting him or calling him numerous times a day.
If you make one or two calls to see how he is doing, that is fine. However, any more than that is sending him a warning, mainly the message to stay away.
Also, it is never a good idea to try to stay close to him by using sex to lure him. That kind of tactic only tells him that you are desperate. A man finds it suffocating to be around his girlfriend too much.
12. Keep Your Place Clean – But Don’t Force It on Him
Men look at messiness differently than a woman. If you want to maintain a clean-living space, you just have to show him by keeping it clean.
A place that is clean and organized is harder to mess up. If your boyfriend still gets things messy, you will need to take time to sit down with him and talk.
While most women are more like Monica Gellar on Friends, most of the men are not like Chandler Bing when it comes to cleaning.
13. Don’t Get Carried Away
While a guy may think it is cute when his girlfriend gets a bit jealous, he will take on a whole new point of view when she gets overdramatic.
If you want to be perceived as one of the best girlfriends of all time, you don’t want to go crazy.
Yes, it’s endearing to ask about someone who is flirting with your man. However, you lack this quality when you start slamming doors or start accusing him of cheating.
4 Ways to Overcome Jealous Thoughts
To overcome jealousy, experts advise that you do the following:
1. Acknowledge the Problem
Recognize that your jealousy is irrational and that you have a problem. When you acknowledge your jealousy, it will be easier to overcome.
2. Decide If It’s You or Him
Ask yourself if your boyfriend has given you any reason not to trust him. Always take the stance – “innocent until proven guilty.”
By giving your partner the benefit of the doubt, you are showing him that your trust him, which will bring you closer together.
3. Check Your Self-Esteem
If your jealousy is coming from unhappy past experiences, you need to develop a belief in yourself.
Any insecurities, such as jealousy, are not the fault of your boyfriend. Why are you doubting yourself?
Instead, tell yourself, “I’m the best girlfriend ever, and my boyfriend is lucky to have me.” If you keep saying it enough, you will believe it.
4. Maintain Open Communications
When jealousy emerges, it results from misunderstandings or less-than-direct communications. While you don’t want to hit him with one question after the next, clarifying some things is important.
However, be reasonable in your approach.
If a question is irrational or may offend your partner, leave the subject alone.
3 Ways to Maintain Control
Indeed, jealousy is the one thing that can take you off his list of being one of the best girlfriends of all time. If you don’t want this to happen, you need to practice the following:
1. Never compare yourself to others.
You are a one-of-a-kind special person, the best girlfriend a guy could have. While there will always be women who may be better looking or smarter, it still does not mean you don’t have something to offer.
After all, some of those special qualities you possess are what attracted him to you in the first place.
2. Don’t break the trust you have by playing games.
If you feel jealous, you may want your partner to feel the same way. In this case, you may resort to game-playing.
However, this type of behavior backfires as it breaks the bond and trust between a couple.
3. Don’t try to make him feel jealous.
You won’t overcome any jealous emotions by building up these feelings between you and your boyfriend. Instead of feeling empowered, you will end up arguing, thereby increasing the distance between the both of you.
While feeling uncertain is natural, the way you deal with it can mean the difference between being one of the best girlfriends of all time or just another girl he dated.
Any irrational feelings, such as jealousy, are counterproductive. If you want your boyfriend to love and respect you, you need to appear positive and self-confident rather than jealous and depressed.
How to Avoid Relationship Downfalls
Now that you have some idea about how to be a ‘best girlfriend’, you need to know some pointers about starting a relationship.
The following information will show you why budding relationships may suddenly disintegrate.
Knowing this information will come in handy, especially if you want to make it your goal to be the best girlfriend ever.
Getting Too Enthusiastic
It happens to all women, or most all women – that feeling that comes when things start off well, or you suddenly hit it off great with a guy. That is when the imagination begins churning.
You drift off to dreamland, contemplating your future life together. You can’t even contemplate seeing someone else.
When this happens, all that enthusiasm can be compared to a high-level sugar spike. That enthusiasm can cause a crash and quick break in your relationship.
When some guys feel even a slight bit of pressure, they will begin to back off.
Thinking about Your Relationship Too Much
When you feel fearful, you may over-analyze your relationship – to the point your cause you guy to find another best girlfriend. If you feel like something is not quite right, you might let your imagination run wild.
For example, you might ask yourself, “What does that emoticon he sent mean?” Was he being cute or did it mean something else?
Maybe you are wondering why he is taking so long to text you.
Is he more interested in someone else? When you spend your time this way, you will lose your standing as ‘best girlfriend’ of all time.
Acting Official before You’re Exclusive
This is one of the most common reasons that guys dart away from commitment. Women stop dating others to devote their time to one partner.
However, to end up being the best girlfriend ever, you still have to keep your options open. The guy you are seeing does not want you to stick a label on your relationship.
Keeping things casual and friendly is better.
Guys want to be monogamous, just like women. However, no man wants to feel tied down. For a man to make a commitment, the woman he is dating must inspire him, or offer him the benefits of having a girlfriend without the obligations of being involved.
If you do not want to date others, that is fine. Just don’t act like you are a guy’s best girlfriend until he makes it official.
That means maintaining your dating profiles online and keeping busy with other things until he decides he likes you as much as you like him.
Having Unrealistic Expectations
Many women, when they are dating, tend only to see what they want to see. It is not their fault, as society leads them to act that way.
We are drawn to the fairytale of princess meeting Prince Charming and living happily ever after.
Sometimes a guy will tell you he wants to date but really is not interested in a relationship. Still, you delude yourself into thinking that he will come around to your way of thinking.
After all, didn’t he take you to a fine dining restaurant and give you flowers? He has even shared some of his hopes and dreams.
All those nice things he said, from time to time, also cause you to believe you’ve met someone who really cares.
Get Things Straight at the Beginning
To make sure you don’t waste your time on believing you are in a real relationship, get things straight at the beginning. Make a list on the three qualities you need in a partner and the three traits that will prevent you from seeing him.
For instance, if you want to find someone to marry, admit it. You won’t realize your goal of being the best girlfriend ever if you don’t clarify your what you want.
Do you have something you can add to the above information? If so, share your observations and experiences. Making mistakes learning from them keep us on the right track when forming and developing bonds.
Does He Really Like You?
Ask the following questions to see how much he likes you:
1. How frequently does he text or call?
- Every day
- 2 to 3 times weekly
- He has never called or texted me
2. Does he usually begin conversations with you over the phone or text messaging?
- Only to make plans or to say, “Hi”
- We have never texted or spoke over the phone
3. Has he ever used the words, “beautiful,” “gorgeous,” or “cute” when commenting on how you look?
4. Is he seeing others right now or in a relationship?
- Yes, he is in a relationship, and he seems to like her
- Yes, he is in a relationship, but he does not seem happy with his partner
- No, he just broke up with someone
- No, he’s single and free
5. Do you really think he likes you? Be truthful.
- Yes, I really think he likes me
- Yes, although I do have some doubts
- I’m getting mixed signals, so I am not sure
- No, but I would be happy if he did
Balance Out Your Life
From the answers you give, you may believe that the guy in your life is still sitting on the fence. To be a ‘best girlfriend’, focus your energy on being your best self.
By balancing out your life, you won’t look at your guy as your primary source for excitement, fulfillment, or happiness.
How to Tell His Level of Interest in You
You will know he likes you when he does the following:
1. Actively Listens to You, and Remembers What You Said.
If he remembers details, such as where you went to college or the name of your first pet, he is interested and listening. It may be tempting to ‘test’ them of their knowledge, but nobody likes being treated like that.
Just take note when they show signs that they care about what you’ve said and want to incorporate it into conversations.
2. Mimics your Body Language
When he mimics your body language, he is trying to make a connection. Other cues to notice are when he leans into you or gives you a deep and absorbing stare.
He may want to see your reaction when he tries to be funny too. Guys will also find ways to touch the woman they like, even if it is “accidental” brushing against your sleeve.
If he avoids eye contact or does not volunteer any information about himself, he is not feeling a connection.
3. Compliments the Way You Look
A guy who likes you will not hesitate to pay a compliment about your appearance. If he really likes you, he will never fail to show his approval in this area.
You can be one of the best girlfriends of all time. You just need to radar in on how a guy thinks.
- Do you think you have what it takes to be the best girlfriend ever?
- What do you want from a relationship?
- Are you on the right track now?
Ask these questions first so you can make better dating choices – choices that will help you get more out of life.